Anonymous said: you DO have thin privilege we don't have being thin is accepted WAY MORE than being even remotely heavy. it really sucks when the thinnest girl in my school, probably about 90 pounds, very tall, is "beautiful" while i'm "gross" "ugly" "too fat to be loved." i'm 15 pounds overweight. every skinny person acts like they have to so hard, and yeah, i get it, everyone has problems, everyone gets bullied, but now we are being pushed away, because thin people matter more apparently.
Thin privilege does exist. Examples? I’m assumed unhealthy just because I don’t have a thigh gap. I am VERY healthy. I go to the gym often, yet just because I’m a little chubby, and don’t have a thigh gap, my bones aren’t jutting out, I’m unhealthy/sloppy. You can actually find your clothing size, even if in the childrens section. I can’t. MOST, I’m saying most, stores in my area, have clothes from a size 0-9. Over that, I get all the unflattering, ugly clothes. Also, they’re fucking EXPENSIVE.
i’m assuming these are connected, since I got them back to back, even if they’re not I’ll reply to both at once…
EVERYONE GETS IT. Fat people get bullied worse, doctors/strangers/family thinks fat people are unhealthy, clothes suck.
BUT FUCKING SAME, DUDE. LITERALLY SAME.
I’ve had one doctor who didn’t try to pin sicknesses (that had NOTHING to do with my weight) on how thin I am. “Gain some weight, you’ll have more energy.” my adrenal system was failing and I had a serious, chronic virus. “Just keep eating and the nausea will get better.” I had FOOD ALLERGIES. “Look, I can’t help you unless you admit you have a problem. Come back when you’re willing to admit your eating disorder.” I did not have an ED, yet I got dismissed. I nearly died because doctors assumed things based on my weight, and DID NOT DO TESTS. They told my mom, “she just wants attention. I’d just ignore her, until she admits her actual problems.” doctors told my mom to IGNORE ME til I DIED pretty much. Thin privilege? totally.
I was bullied mercilessly by nearly everyone in my school, and teachers/the principal/my parents fucking ignored it because I’m thin, so I *must* know I’m beautiful. This is stupid as fuck for tons of reasons, but I was also told I was supposed to let the fat girls pick on me because they are jealous. I was told that my feelings do not matter because of FAT GIRLS’. And I was treated like a bitch for saying, “Look this is really getting to me and I’m starting to have suicidal thoughts, can someone please get them to stop.”
Don’t even get me started on clothes. I’ve gone three years now with one pair of jeans because I cannot find anything that fits my tall, thin body that I can afford. Every pair of sweatpants just falls the fuck down because they are too large. I have to get bras and underwear and shorts from the fucking kids section because I can’t fit into anything in the womens’. Good fucking thing I never need to look halfway nice, because I would not be able to find clothes because they are all TOO BIG.
Stop ignoring other people’s problems because you perceive yours to be the end of the fucking world.
ps. I didn’t even mention wait staff or friends joking about slipping me things I was fucking ALLERGIC TO because I “would look so much better if I gained a few pounds.”
also you have to be delusional if you think a thigh gap is considered a sign of health. seriously.
Things that fat people should start saying to “skinny bitches.”
- Your body shape isn’t set in stone, you can change it if you try hard enough
- You would look so much better if you just gained like 50 pounds
- It’s not like it’s that hard to gain weight, you just need to change your diet
- Well don’t complain to me, you just aren’t trying hard enough to gain weight
- Gaining weight just takes a bit of will power
- Being that skinny isn’t healthy
- You’re far too thin to pull off that outfit. It would look so much better on someone with bigger curves.
- You’re really pretty for a skinny girl.
- Ugh, skinny people are so unattractive. Except for you, skinny friend, you’re one of the rare ones.
- Are you sure you want to eat that salad? You’re never going to gain weight if you keep eating like that.
- It’s your own fault that you’re skinny. You just don’t care enough about yourself.
- You’re never going to attract a significant other if you stay that thin. No one wants to date someone as skinny as you.
- You have a physical or mental ailment? Oh, if you just gained some weight, I’m sure you’d feel so much better.
- Wow, you’re so confident for a skinny person! I don’t think I could be as confident as you are if I were that thin.
Then maybe they’d see that they’re being ridiculous when they get offended by two songs, sung by people who are not fat, using the term “skinny bitches”
I have heard all of these from tons of people for years. Family, friends, strangers, doctors, teachers, wait staff, you name it.
I;ve been called worthless because of my weight, unlovable, disgusting, a freak, unworthy of love.
People often also called me “skinny bitch” in a very derogatory way.
Anonymous said: "Thin privilege is being able to open a magazine/watch TV/a movie and seeing someone who has your body type/looks like you" - Ahahahaha NO. I'm thin. I've never seen anyone in magazines, on TV or in the movies who looks like me. There are more body types than "fat" and "thin".
the really, really terrible part about this is that they recognize that, when its fat bodies. like, i’ve seen them post things about how its thin privilege that “all plus size models have an hourglass body and no stomach and big boobs and a nice butt and they’re PHOTOSHOPPED!!!”
but still, they even completely discredit thin shaming because “you look like girls in magazines!!!!” but no, nobody does, not even the girls in the magazines becuase they are all lighting and angles and make up and soooo much photoshop.
TITP likes to ignore that its set up to make everyone feel bad enough about themselves that they’ll spend copious amounts of money to change their appearance.
Anonymous said: It frustrates me to no end that my mainly obese family polices what I eat. I am in the healthy weight range and easily one of the smallest family members. I have a history of eating disorders and they constantly make fun of me for not eating deserts/fattening foods. Any advice? I get temped to yell at them but my family is loving and otherwise supportive. Oh, btw- i am seeing a nutritionist and therapist.
ahh i forgot to answer this before now and i do apologize.
its terrible that your family is being so rude :/ i’m sure you have, but have you clearly stated that what they say/do is really hurtful and why? if they still don’t listen, i can only think of cutting them out of your life a bit. hopefully that would make them realize this is important to you.
i wish you luck on your battles with eating disorders/other mental issues <3
Anonymous said: this is kind of an off-topic question. I have seen a psychiatrist who has straight up told me that I suffer from EDNOS, but she did not "officially" diagnose me because I didn't want my parents to find out. Earlier you said that unless you have been diagnosed, you can't claim the title. Do you think this applies to my situation?
i don’t really want to be like the police about this.
i think you have every right to claim it, or at least say you have an eating disorder. i really just meant people (like those on TITP) who don’t go to a doctor and claim a diagnosis, or claim one they know cannot possibly apply to them, or reject the diagnosis they are given for a “better” one (so anorexia).
either way, i really hope you are getting treatment for it or decide to.
Anonymous said: when I was in highschool, a girl made a speech about box gaps "not being realistic". I remember when in the question time I told her that I had one and then proceeded to show her (I was being very spiteful but she was an asshat) she called me 'fake' and probably 'ano'. So many people who promote 'positive body image' just want to validate their bodies by putting down people who naturally have bodies society likes more. It doesnt make me fake that I'm skinny with big tits, blame rockin genetics.
ehh, the idea of “rockin genetics” should be abolished really. the idea that its lucky to be born with big boobies and nothing else is pointless and harmful to everyone in the end.
I really don’t understand approaching body positivity by “vilifying” the ideals or whatever. I can’t think of a better way to put it. the whole “dogs are for bones” “thigh gaps are gross/people hwo have them are sick” I don’t get why it can’t simply be “exist in your body and strive to be happy in it and don’t use it to hurt others”
planetary--hoe said: Apparently, thin privilege is getting the "you're probably that thin because you don't eat meat", "you don't want cake? you're gonna be one of those girls that diets, aren't you!?" and "you should eat more" lectures every other day. It's also hearing your best friend ask "don't you hate it when guys like girls like thigh gaps?" even when they know you have one. It's also your boyfriend telling you how thin you are every time food is brought up. How can people say we don't have problems???
Oh, they admit thin people have problems but “being told to eat a burger once isn’t a big deal” and you can “always get it tailored or shop in the kids section.”
their whole argument seems to come down to “yeah, but we don’t perceive your problems as bad enough to count. also ours look worse when we deny all of yours.”
I mean, maybe less people would say “but thin people DO deal with that, lots…” if they quit saying “fat people have to deal with this BUT THIN PEOPLE DON’T NOT EVER AND NOT SERIOUSLY”
Recently I have started a gluten free diet because I have a suspected gluten-intolerance (not the same as Celiac FYI) but it’s not 100% proven because I would have to pay a specialist a ridiculous amount of money to be allergy tested ($800 AU). My GP said that he believed I probably had a gluten intolerance and to adopt a gluten free diet for the foreseeable future as I told him that already doing so had helped with my symptoms considerably. Unfortunately, blood tests cannot diagnose an allergy to gluten, it will only detect Celiac Disease.
Anyway, so I haven’t been eating gluten for quite some time now and it’s made me feel so much better, a big indicator that this was what made me feel tired and gave me stomach cramps that were so bad I had to stay at home from University. But now of course, I have to ask when I go out to eat if certain things are gluten free and I have to explain to people that I don’t eat gluten.
And the number one response? Not ‘oh, are you Celiac? Are you allergic to wheat?’ or something like that. No, nearly every single time the reaction is ‘is it because you’re on one of those diets or something?’ or ‘are you doing it to lose weight?’.
And I have to wonder; would I get these questions if I wasn’t fat? I am small fat, what you would probably call an in-between person (about 50% of the time I fit into the top end of straight-size clothing, depending on the store) but I am also a big person. I’m tall with wide shoulders and hips. I doubt that I would if I looked like the other two people I know who have the same condition, both of whom are below 5’5” and are size 8-10 (I don’t know what that is in US sizes, sorry!)
Another thing that has annoyed me too is looking up gluten free recipes and being bombarded with “GREAT WAY TO LOSE WEIGHT” and “LOW FAT AND GREAT FOR YOU!” as the number one selling points of these products or recipes. Why should laying off gluten immediately be about being thin and therefore some sort of ‘good person’?
Thin privilege is being able to have special dietary requirements and not have people assume this is because you are trying to lose weight.
Oh, and I haven’t lost any weight since the change in my diet. Funny, that.
"And I have to wonder; would I get these questions if I wasn’t fat?"
well, in my experience, YES! As a very thin person, when I needed to cut gluten (and many, many other common foods) out of my diet, nearly everyone first assumed it was to lose weight!!!!!!!!
I got countless comments about how I shouldn’t try to lose weight! People (wait staff, friends, FAMILY) asked me if I had an eating disorder, told me I didn’t need to lose weight, but I could “stand to gain a few lbs! Maybe get a boyfriend ;)”
Sometimes, even after the 5th time I’d explained that I was avoiding foods because they made me SICK not because I had a problem with my looks, they would offer me things. “I’ll buy you ice cream!” “Wanna get a pizza?” I’d explain that even a little bit could harm me, they did not care! “Come on, just one piece won’t make you gain weight…” They would joke about slipping real! sugar into my food (the replacement I used had the same amount of cals anyways), of making food with real milk instead. I was actually very afraid of people who cared about me giving me things that were poisonous to me so I would gain weight.
They. did. not. believe. it. was. not. about. weight loss. and I was underweight when I began, and lost a few lbs anyways. Maybe you should listen to thin people about their stories instead of assuming they are treated differently.
Anonymous said: Encouraging deadly behaviors and discouraging healthy ones is bullshit. Yes it is wonderful to love your body, everyone is all for that. But it is clear that it's not what you are doing if you are drastically overweight. You want to be drastically overweight and continue to love yourself? Fine. But don't spew bs about how everyone should accommodate your dumbass/whine when they don't, or preach that it is 'healthy' & ok to others. Not a question but wanted to get it out there, anyways, ily babe.
haha, let it all out its safe here.
pretty much yes, though.
Anonymous said: I honestly wonder if the people at TiTP have ever encountered anyone with chronic anorexia, because it's seriously horrifying. My sister's recovering, and at her smallest was 5'7 and 64lbs, with a BMI of 10(!). It wasn't glamorous, and she looked less like a supermodel and more like a starvation victim. She was super frail and her malnutrition and illness drastically affected her personality. It's an awful disease and you can't claim it just because you skip breakfast or ate a salad once.
They would probably say its harder when you don’t look like you’re starving because no one believes you. Which I know happens, but is a separate issue entirely. They seem unsympathetic to thin, eating-disordered people and very much more focused on proving how much worse they have it.
I seriously hope your sister was able to recover, that sounds horrifying for everyone involved! I hope you were all able to get past it <3